ni.chol.as

I was updating a profile last night with a list of authors I’ve been reading recently when something peculiar happened. I went to type “Philip K. Dick” and ended up typing “Philip K. Cock”.

I am confused and saddened by this, as you might expect. I mean, was this an unconscious semantic substitution let loose by tiredness and a bottle of beer? Does it count as a Freudian slip? Do I think that such a well-regarded science fiction author is actually a bit of a prick? Or maybe it was a simple typo that just happened to come up with a synonym by luck. Looking at my keyboard, it doesn’t take more than a small error in fingering to, er, cock it up.

I made a similar mistake years ago, when I had to fix a computer upstairs at an old employer. The computer belonged to a very pretty girl, and I’d done most of what I needed just by guiding her to click here and there. Just to prove everything was fine, I leaned over her and typed “test“, except my left hand was one key too far left and it typed “twat“. I blushed horribly and fled, apologising profusely.

Does this happen to other people, or am I special?